New year, New Me? My battle with New Year’s resolutions.
I must admit, New Year’s resolutions are not for me.
Why not, I hear you ask? Well, to be totally honest, it’s because I use them to beat myself up.
How? Well, I find that I pressure myself into keeping to the resolution. That pressure turns it into a chore and when I (inevitably) don’t stick to it, I berate myself for failing. I don’t need that sort of negative self-talk in my life. I’m working through enough negative self-talk as it is. Why would I want to add more!
Instead of making New Year resolutions, I set myself goals.
Same thing yeah? Well, that depends on your perspective. I’ll elaborate…
I see a New Year resolution as a task that I have to complete. For me, it’s a ridged line from which I cannot stray. This leads to the kinds of pressure and negative self-talk that I describe above.
A goal is a destination… and a destination needs a journey… I LOVE a journey!
Why do I love a journey? A journey not only takes you towards your goal, but it also allows you to discover new and unexpected twists and turns along the way. Yes, there will be bumps, holes and trials, but there will also be joy, lightness, sunrises on mountain tops, reflections in lakes, circular rainbows and unicorns… well maybe not unicorns, but you never know!
Now, if you’ve already set yourself a New Year’s resolution, that’s fabulous! Truly, and honestly, I hope you stick to it. But please take a moment to consider how you’ll treat yourself if you do stray from that ridged line. Will you beat yourself up with negative self-talk? Will you call yourself a failure for straying? If you are totally honest with yourself and your answer is ‘yes, I will beat myself up a bit’, then maybe you could consider changing your resolution to a goal. That way you can try to enjoy the journey – with all its ups and downs, and twists and turns – rather than beating yourself with negative self-talk about failure.
If you do stray from the path when you’re on a journey, you’re not a failure… you’re just on a slightly different path heading towards the same goal… your goal! And you never know what you’ll discover on this new path… You might find that elusive unicorn.
Go out and enjoy your journey, friends!
I’d love to know what goal’s you’re setting yourself for 2022.
Let me know in the comments below.